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Why I’m giving up

All hail the kitchen goddess.

Over the weekend, I became a cuisine phenom.

Historically, my only relationship with that room was reluctant or ravenous.

But in the last couple of days I’ve joyfully made pesto, lavender shortbread cookies, lime bars, feta, apple & pesto pizza and artichoke & pine nut pizza (don’t knock it until you try it).

From scratch, my friend. 

I like cooking and baking for the same reason I like sitcoms and epic music videos. For the clear beginning, middle and end and the sense of satisfaction that comes when it’s all said and done.

Making food gives great instant gratification.

Business building does not.

There’s working, investing, visioning, praying, striving, working some more, big wins, small wins and never actually knowing how it’s all going to turn out.

Unlike the tried and true predictability of a recipe, business is just a hopeful crapshoot.

So, I’ve decided to GIVE UP.

I’m letting go of all the working and writing and studying and classes and clients and marketing and mentorships and investing and researching and products and pushing and workworkworking.

D-O-N-E.

I’ve been building SisterFire with a determination that was rewarded during my tenure at Microsoft and throughout the non-profit world but in my own venture has left me feeling anxious and unfulfilled.

In all of the hustle and bustle and perfectionistic striving, I got disconnected from why I started my own business in the first place.

I don’t really care about being a successful businesswoman.

I care about making SisterFire a vehicle for helping women transform the world.

I care about making my business successful.

Totally different ballgame.

So, I’ve given up the pseudo safety net of other people’s roadmaps and am creating one of my own.

This feels riskier, less strategic, more vulnerable. It requires letting go, exploring hard questions and trusting myself more than ever before.

Of course I am continually learning, growing, pushing and moving forward. But my motivation has changed. Instead of creating a business that follows someone else’s rules, I’m blazing my own trail.

Because the truth is, whether I follow someone else’s sage advice or listen deeper to my own intuition, it’s all still a crapshoot.

Nothing is guaranteed. Might as well do it your own way.

Allow your whys to shape your path. Why do you want what you want? Why have you defined that success? Why are you dreaming that dream?

There’s a greater opportunity to be fulfilled and enjoy the journey—regardless of where you end up—when you know your whys.

In the meantime, I’m going to get started on today’s rice pudding.

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